If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
