my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
