she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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