But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
