the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize