i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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