why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
