i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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