how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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