maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
