dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Randomize
