I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Randomize