I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
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