She said her name was "party"
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
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