I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
