I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
