Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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