I'm gonna have a badass scar
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Randomize
