trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
