You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
