i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Randomize
