I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
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