That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
