My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Enjoy the penises
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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