have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
