i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
