is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
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