Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
