I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Randomize