You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize