I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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