I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
vagina is talking i cant
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
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