So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Randomize
