Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Boobs are out for the taking
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
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