remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
