hell yes lets make some ravioli
Another night of drunkeness. Maybe I shouldn't have played death pong...
Didn't you just get a DUI last week?
Indeed I did but death didn't stop Jesus now did it
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I don't think brook has ever known best
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize