Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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