yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
