just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
Randomize
