tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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