Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
Randomize