jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
