i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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