we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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