There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
Randomize
