yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Randomize
