You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Randomize
