Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize