If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
