capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
