so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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