In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Randomize