idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I need to stop coming to work sober
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
